A Great New Offer

Have you ever felt guilty about the amount of pollution and carbon that you put out in to the atmosphere? Have you ever wished there was a way to reduce the amount of your “Carbon Footprint” but didn’t know how to do this without changing the way you live? It’s a huge issue these days, especially with global warming and everything. Well, your answer has finally arrived.

Al Gore has paved the way yet again by teaching us a solution. He is the Global Warming Messiah. You see, he spent over $30,000 dollars last year to heat and light his house for just him and his wife. Now, If you just heard that, you would think he was a big huge hypocrite for telling us we need to reduce our carbon output while he increased his to a point of unbelief. But to counter his carbon output all he had to do was purchases “Carbon Credits”. These are from homeless people who don’t use as much carbon as real people do.

So for every 5 thousand kilowatt hours (the average American households power usage for 6 months) you can buy these “Carbon Credits”. And once you’ve purchased such credits, a homeless person, representing the credits bought, will be shipped to your house. Al Gore bought 38 homeless people last year alone. And now he has a clear conscience knowing that he has evened the balance and done his part to reduce his portion of greenhouse gasses.

And now this offer is available for everyone (except homeless people). You too can be guilt free and well on your way to a happy life of luxury with a simple phone call to Enviro Friendly Corp. It’s as easy as that. And your very own homeless person will be collected in an area near you and brought to you in a hybrid car so you don’t have to worry about the emissions from a jet during shipping. The Homeless person even comes with a cage free of charge. But hurry to get in on this offer while supplies last. It’s the great new offer by Enviro Friendly Corp. Remember, do the right thing, like Al Gore.

“I’m Al Gore and I approved this message”